Project: Lean On Me

Mental health should never be an issue we have to face alone. Letters to Strangers is working to foster open communication about mental health on campus through Project Lean on Me, an outlet for students to share stories and provide support. After all, many of us go through similar struggles, and we can draw an incredible amount of strength from each other.

Share a story or piece of advice using our anonymous submission form

See past submissions on our Instagram, @leanonme_princeton

"I thought I had to be superhuman. I had to take every opportunity, ace every class, and fight every battle because, well, I go to Princeton. I forgot that I am human first. I live with the repercussions of that burnout every day."

"Sometimes we can be so harsh on ourselves, never satisfied with what we've achieved, constantly comparing ourselves to others and then call that 'motivation'. In such cases, it is important to remember that we never look at our friends and think 'ah she's not doing enough' or 'she is going to have a bleak future'. We should extend that same confidence we have in our friends to ourselves, because after all, we're forever our own best friend."

"I struggled with depression during my senior year of high school. Flustered with the need to apply and be accepted into an Ivy League, I felt down, sad, and discouraged after my early action school rejected me. Fast forward three months, Princeton accepted, and yet I still felt as if I had not achieved enough. I wondered why Stanford and Yale and the other schools rejected me, questioning my self-worth and burdening myself that perfection is key. This story may sound like a rant about elitism and my ungratefulness, but many students — especially high school seniors — are in my position, and I just wanted to say that your intended path isn't necessarily the easiest one, or the one you expected, but it's always your path. And yours only."

“When I was in eighth grade, I went through a period of time where I was consistently depressed for no apparent reason and became very anti-social. I’m pretty sure that if I had gone to seek medical help, I would have been diagnosed with some form of depression, but I never did, because my parents never thought that mental health was a big deal. I have long since recovered, but I’m hesitant to tell my story, even to a community of people who have experience with mental illnesses because I’ve been told that it’s not ok to self-diagnose, and that someone who doesn’t actually experience mental health issues shouldn’t go around saying that they do. Because of this I sometimes find myself doubting my own experiences — maybe it’s just teenage angst? Everyone has highs and lows, and I’m just making a big deal out of nothing at all? Except every time I think back on the emotions I experienced in eighth grade it feels so real, and it’s really painful to not have a definite verdict on what it was that I had.”

"I like journaling, but recently I've really been feeling extrovert withdrawal, especially given the busy schedules of my friends, who I haven't been able to talk to as much. A really fun thing to do is write in your journal like you're talking to a friend! It's essentially a letter to a friend but kept in a journal, and you can choose to send it, or just feel better after having a quasi-conversation with a good friend."

“I’ve decided when I get back to campus I’m going to start smiling at random people on my walk to class. Everything going on in the world has made me realize many students probably feel alienated, particularly our POCs, LGBTQ+ peers, and mental health survivors. It might be awkward to smile at strangers, but I’m hoping smiling catches on and makes campus a bit more welcoming.”

"I don’t know why no one talks about self harm at Princeton. The best way to prevent someone from self harming is with support, accountability, and transparency. None of those things exist until someone starts the conversation."

When my depression was at its worst, I was considering taking a year off from Princeton. In the end, I didn't, but for a few months I was in a lot of contact with my academic dean and the dean of my res college. This was a really frustrating process because there was very little they could do. Structurally, Princeton is not built for people with health issues. It is built to push us down and push us away, no matter how much we may intellectually belong on this campus. For instance, at literally any other university you can take a semester off, but at Princeton, you have to take an entire year off, which is much more disruptive and hard to fill. They love to flex their resources, but you end up doing what I call "resource-bouncing," which is when you get recommended from one resource to the next, meet with a bunch of people, etc., and don't really get any tangible help from it. It's like, the resources are there, but they don't do anything.